Its been a pretty great month so far considering some of the outside pressures of job security, money spending, holidays, family expectations etc.

We are both hoping for a very special Christmas gift from Santa this year... but we're at a pretty good place in that if we don't get that BFP we'll be okay.

I saw my naturopath again last week (she's back in the office about 10 hours a week and her little guy is now 7 weeks on Monday) and she said two things that really stood out in a matter of 30 minutes (the length of our session)

I was talking to her about family just not getting or seeming to be sympathetic to what we're going through and she can totally identify with me as it took her and her DH 2 years to conceive. but what she said was you're morning the loss of a child every month, an unborn child every single month and I never looked at it from that perspective before... of course with every period came a short period of tears, frustration, feelings of failure, disappointment and fear...... every month morning the loss of the child we want so very very much. WOW!

The other thing she said is if we haven't conceived by spring we'll take the next step... next step consists of some fertility monitoring with fertility clinic in our small town (which I'm told some of her other patients have had great success and experienced excellent bedside manner). The words charting, tests and ultrasounds came up and of course have DH tested to which I had my own questions answered about just how that takes place (not what the movies/tv would have you think which was a big relief and something I know DH won't have a problem with). I feel good about where we're at in the TTC journey and our relationship and our renewed excitement... DH has taken the bull by the horns lol and we're having more fun baby dancing then we have in a while *blushing* so like I said we're in a great place.

Something else I've been visualizing is what Christy said about having a bouncing baby with us next holiday season at all these family gatherings that have proven to add to the bag of stresses then been a place of comfort and acceptance. We are growing stronger and stronger as a couple and as a growing family.