Friday, June 23
What can I say....it's finally Friday! My wonderful husband is running around picking up everything we'll need for tomorrow. We're having an open house and have invited many people that we couldn't have to the wedding. Should be a lot of fun, not a huge crowd expected but I'm sure that will make everything just right.
NV PB bar - 5 pts
Chicken Caesar salad - 5pts
Fruit salad - 2pts
Lindt Chocolate - 6pts
Water - 32 fl.oz. of 99.4
Total Points: 18pts (allowed 24/day - 5/35 weekly allowance used)
Thursday, June 22
Wednesday, June 21
Well it finally happened I ran into what we'll call an old friend/colleague/coworker. We originally worked together at one of my first jobs which started as a co-op and our friendship took off, we did everything together. She a single mom, myself a young and impressionable woman wanting to get to work and make a good impression. So we ended up starting a little business on the side while we where working together, not long after I learned my contract was coming to an end and I'd be moving on to other things. And I decided I'd jump 2 feet first into running our little business. Ultimately I made the decision that I couldn't run this business with her in it because I needed to make it work on my terms and not worry about having to pay her her share when I'm relying solely on the income to look after myself. And I had a sense that she was starting to think she had groomed me for lack of a better word into the 'young business woman' that I was. Which is ridiculous because not only did I do everything to start our business (minus doing the logo personally) but I also had started a business at only 17 years old in my hometown amongst other achievements in my young career. Anyways I'm getting off track. So I had 'the talk' and told her I needed to go it on my own to which she informed me if I ever did 'this' (start a division of the business that had always been her dream) she'd drag my name through the mud in this city that I'd never be able to find work. Nice eh?! So as time passed after I left that work place we saw each other less and less. She met a guy, I met a guy and she married her guy in a surprise wedding to which I didn't know I was suppose to be there taking the pictures because I was with my guy and we where suppose to be up north visiting his friends (but I ended up sick and he took care of me all weekend).
So it finally happened, this was almost 3 years ago and I finally ran into her at the print business we both still use. I was shocked, I gave her a brief hug, good to see you was said, I said how are you and she said good, I admired her little girl (1 1/2 yrs. old now) and then carried on with my business at the printers. She never once asked me 'how are you doing??'
I've gone through ups and downs of worrying about running into this woman, sometimes wishing we where still friends, sometimes thanking god we aren't but if anything I do realize this, she came into my life for a short time to teach me something about myself. I didn't like who I became when I was with her. Someone who would look down on other people that weren't dressed just right or heavy, someone who would gossip about others, someone who put their whole self worth on how well I was dressed or how slim I was....... It didn't feel good that other friends kept their distance when I was around her and that I actually fought with one of my closer friends over something I did that was completely and totally wrong and hurtful for me to do to her. I hadn't hurt someone that way since grade school when I told a guy I liked that he deserved better then the girl he was dating. Sick! But when I walked into the printers and saw her standing there all I wanted was to be thin, for her to see me thin because this would mean (in her eyes) I was doing great. But I couldn't tell her (because she didn't even care to ask) I married an awesome man, we are so in love, we bought a house and we're going to start a family someday, and I have so many people in my life that believe in me just as I am and I feel good about just being me. I couldn't tell her because she didn't even care to ask. I'm not going to beat myself up about trying to figure out what she's thinking and why things happened the way they did. I guess if anything I served a purpose in her life too and now........... That time has passed.
NV PB bar - 5pts
Burger on 1/2 a bun w/cheese - 9pts
Multi-grain chips - 5pts
bbq chicken - 2pts
ceasar salad - 3pts
Water - 64fl.oz. of 99.4
Total Points: 25pts (allowed 24/day - 5/35 weekly allowance used)
Tuesday, June 20
During the ceremony
Mom (in blue), officiant, flower girl, maid of honour - my sister, us, & our best man
Pictures at Mill Race Park after the ceremony and all the family grouping pictures which was close to torture as a photographer and not being the one giving the direction! lol
Our beautiful little flower girl who it turned out was completely taken with my sister. The flower girl is also the best man's daughter.
Thanks to all our family and friends for making
it such an amazing and special day!
So when the heck am I going to get into the excercise part of my healthy lifestyle?? I'm hosting an open house this weekend for all our friends and colleagues we couldn't have at the wedding so after we get this last bit of wedding celebrating out of the way I'll be good. Tired but it will all be over. And then all that will be left to do is write the thank-you notes... I don't even want to think about that just yet. No excuses now that we've rec'd the pictures from our photographer. And don't forget the paperwork of changing my last name.
So with the help of sparkpeople.com I have a weight-lifting program 3 days a week and I'm adding Turbo in for the cardio days. And I really want to get back into walking on my lunch breaks whenever I can. I'm really bad at not taking my breaks and always eating lunch at my desk. I need to get away from this place so I can recharge my batteries and be pumped to go home and workout after a long days work. Well not that long only 8:30 to 4:30pm which are great hours but this place will suck the life out of you if given the chance and I've already put in just over a year of chances.
NV PB bar - 5pts
1 small plum - 1 pt
instant veggie chili - 4pts
dinner at caseys - small variety of appatizers shared with husband - 18pts
Water - 50 fl.oz. of 99.4
Total Points: 28pts (allowed 24/day - 4/35 weekly allowance used)
Monday, June 19
Today I had a meeting afterwork with another small business owner turned personal friend. But the meeting was first dinner then some talk about photography and doing a brochure and then another client turned personal friend joined us for dessert. Dinner was very good and I was starving which is terrible because I completely overate. Also if there is ever anyone out there that is hard to say 'no' to it's her. Usually I have a pretty strong back bone but she would literally be offended if I didn't eat while in her home. I know I need to sort this problem out because I honestly value her friendship and hope it will continue for many years to come but I'm going to have to limit my visiting hours if I can't put my foot down and make sure she knows I can't eat more then what is already on my plate. Oh and did I mention she's a chocolatier??? You know just the icing on the cake......... should probably only visit on cheat meal days!!!
Tomorrow is a new day!
NV PB bar - 5pts
veggie + dip - 2pts
2 oz. cheese + veggie crackers - 4pts
Tortillini - 8pts
Tomato & Cucumber salad w/vinegar bassed dressing - 3pts
Bread - 4pts
Fruit pieces & marble cake style bread - 6pts
Water - 100fl.oz. of 99.4
Total Points: 32pts (allowed 24/day - 43/35 weekly allowance used)
Today was cheat meal day. We where visiting my dad and step mom and where heading to a family gathering late afternoon. I will say I was more controlled that I have been in the past at one of these family gatherings. I love going to visit my 'step' aunt and uncle we have so much fun, lots of laughter, good music and company and of course food lots and lots of food. It was a bbq and not only did we have chicken but also on the grill was steak and sausage. We had roasted vegetables, a pasta salad, greek salad, and another spinach salad mixture with an olive oil dressing. And after dinner was done came of course dessert....... a variety of deserts 4 to be exact. So how well did I do?? Not bad. I over did it a bight with the smoked/salty almonds. But here's a break down.
10:30am - green tea
4:00pm - almonds, 2 scoops of the tortilla dip
6:00pm - roasted vegetables, 3oz. chicken, 3oz. steak, 2 helpings of salads, 1/2 cup pasta salad
8:30pm - dessert - half a piece of black forest cake, a piece of the pistachia version of sex in a pan
11:45pm - another piece of pistachio dessert
Water - 100fl.oz. of 99.4
I was drinking water like crazy and nothing else. Usually I'd have wine but I decided to stick to the water, 1. I was driving home and 2. I didn't need the extra sugar. I was saving that for dessert!
Total Points: ??pts (no idea nor do I want to know - I think I can write off the balance of weekly allowance pts) (allowed 24/day - 35/35 weekly allowance used)
Then is was the drive home. A 2 hour drive home. We crawled into bed around mid-night finally. I'm sure it will catch up to us later in the week. But it was worth it to see everyone and watch our wedding video too with our extended family. So much fun to see almost a month after the big day. :-)
Last night I over indulged on 3 of my 2 pt. frozen yogurt pops. Knocked the points off my the extra allowance for the week. I was so board and just couldn't sit still. My husband was working his last day of nights and I couldn't wait to share the weekend with him. Eventually fell asleep on the couch watching a movie and then he finally came home around 2am.
Banana - 2 pts
NV PB bar (2) - 5 pt
picnic lunch - bread, meat, cheese, veggies, dip & fruit - 6pts
BBQ - chicken thighs - 6pts
Greek Salad - 9pts
Water - 64 fl.oz. of 99.4
Total Points: 28pts (allowed 24/day - 30/35 weekly allowance used)
Friday, June 16
I can't wait to sleep a little later tomorrow. To not have to get out of bed at the sound of an alarm clock or rather the music it plays is awesome. Luckily my internal clock wakes me up around 9am which isn't sleeping in considering sleeping in use to mean I was getting up around 12noon or later depending on the previous nights events. Tomorrow my husband (love calling him that now, yeah! 3 weeks married today) are planning to do some work around the house/yard and then head south to visit my Dad and Step mom for the rest of the weekend. Sunday afternoon will be spent with lots of family in celebration of fathers day. And of course we'll get to see Brandy (my brother, technically speaking, I'm sure only dog lovers will think I'm not completely crazy) He went in for an operation on his back leg Wednesday and the vet said he's doing good and is already trying to stand on it. Thank goodness! As my step mom doesn't have any kids (other then my sister and I of course) Brandy is definitely considered to be her "baby" in every sense of the word. She cried when they dropped Brandy off for us to baby sit for 2 weeks and then she cried again when we brought him home, I'm sure those where happy tears though!
Strawberries + NV PB sweet n' salty bar- 5 pt
Veggies + dip - 2pts
Roasted Veggie Lasagna - 6pts
Blue pc chicken pizza - 11pts
Water - ____fl.oz. of 99.4
Total Points: 24pts (allowed 24/day - 22/35 weekly allowance used)
Thursday, June 15
Nature Valley granola Bars (2 pcs.) - 5pts.
Small Plum - 1 pt
7 grain curry cold salad - 5pts
ww crackers - 2pts
Veggie + dip - 2 pts
Curried chicken and rice - 11pts
Veggie + dip - 2 pts
Frozen Yogurt pop - 2pts
Water - 94fl.oz. of 99.4
Total Points: 30pts (allowed 24/day - 22/35 weekly allowance used)
It's amazing how much you can eat in a day....yikes!!! It all adds up without thinking about it. I've noticed over the last couple of days all the times I wanted to grab something else to eat. I know I'm an emotional eater. I'll eat when I'm sad, happy, board....and the list goes on. Being conscience of what I put in my mouth I think is my biggest struggle. And making sure I don't grab a chocolate bar to reward myself for loosing the first 5 lbs (when that day comes, shortly I hope! lol) that I haven't succeeded in changing my thinking and thus my health.
Wednesday, June 14
So I thought I'd try to liven things up a bight and make my blog more interesting with a picture. I promise there will be many more in the future (being a photographer and all). But here's one with me in front of the camera, our wedding day. Almost three weeks ago now we tied the knot. We've been together 2 1/2 years now and it was just an awesome, awesome day! I can't wait to get all the professional shots back! This one was taken by my Aunt. And I've had a few emails from my Uncle confirming some peoples names for the video. Something else I can't wait to see as one of my parent's friends was doing the video work and well........... he's hilarious and I'm sure he probably caught many people off guard with his questions! I'll post more pics in the next couple of weeks.
I have noticed now that the big day has come and gone I'm not sure what to do with myself. It's weird to try and refocus on other things again now that the wedding isn't such a huge distraction from my regular day to day life. I guess that's why I'm turning my focus on healthy living. I want it to become second nature before we start our family. We both need to shed some weight and knowing how to look after ourselves first will make us better parents in the long run.
So today I'm planning on going straight home rather then run errands which I've done so far this week. And I can hit country produce, love that grocery store, before they close. I need to get my veggie bags all cut up and sorted. I like to prepare individual veggie bags with a variety of veggies so my husband or I can grab it and go. And also need to boil up some hard boiled eggs, something else I enjoy tossing in my lunch box.
Nature Valley granola Bars (2 pcs.) - 5pts.
hummus and ww crackers - 3pts
Small salad with crap meat and dressing - 3pts
2 cups of watermelon - 2pts
NV sweet n' salty bar - 4pts
Cauliflower n' dip - 1pt
PC Blue chicken pizza - 11pts
Water - 64 fl.oz. of 99.4
Total Points: 29pts (allowed 24/day - 16/35 weekly allowance used)
Tuesday, June 13
Resting Heart Rate: beats/minute: I'll try to remember to check in the morning
I'm undecided about posting pictures but it does make things more interesting overall.
Neck - 14.5
Bust - 45.5
Waist - 40
Hips - 46.5
L Thigh - 25
R Thigh - 24.5
L Bicep - 14
R Bicep - 14
Nature Valley granola Bars (2 pcs.) - 2pts. (oops, actually 5pts.)
Chicken Caesar salad - 4pts.
Burger w/cheese - 6pts (went a little overboard with lunch)
2 cups of Veggies with dip - 2pts.
2 cups of whole wheat pasta w/olive oil & spice - 18pts.
Water - 96 fl.oz. (recommended water intake 99.4 fl.oz.)
Total Points: 35pts (allowed 24 - 11/35 allowance used)
WW gives you 35 points each week on top of your daily point allowance
Okay enough is enough I've had it with this weight stuff and I can't keep telling myself this is okay. There is so much I want for my future and life that being heavier is going to get in the way off. So today slowly but surely I'm going to make the changes and build on small life changes in order to finally become the person, the woman that I want to be. Healthy, active and full of energy to share with those around me.
I can't set a number in terms of weight loss I think my body will tell me when I've made it to my goal weight. I'm currently 198.8 lbs. I've already tried just about everything under the sun and mentally I know I have all the tools for success I just need to put those tools to work for me. Every time I've tried to loose weight before I throw myself at it full force and ultimately I can't keep up the pace I set for myself and within 6 weeks I've fallen off the wagon. I have a number of beachbody.com products. P90, Slim in 6, Power Half Hour, and most recently Turbo Jam (which I love). I love it and when I was sticking with it I saw inches lost in minimal time but well my husband and I just got married the end of May and planning the big day pretty much took over my life. I've always thought in the past oh this would be the perfect incentive, or this, or my wedding day and no, no, no! It never works. It never keeps me going long enough to feel like I've succeeded. So what are my plans to take off the weight?
Exercise: First things first, Turbo Jam. I really did love these DVD's when I first received them and I know if I start small I can build on it. So today I will commit to doing a Turbo Jam workout at least 3 days out of the week. And the other 3 will be 20 minute weight programs as outlined on sparkpeople.com for me.
Food: I'm going to allow myself one cheat meal a week. (I got this tool from Weight Watchers) And I'm going to stick with the point system, again from WW. I've tried to follow my eating using fitday.com and sparkpeople.com and it becomes a chore, even sitting at a computer all day you'd think I'd enjoy the distraction from work but nope never seem to be able to keep it up. I think the point system keeps things pretty simple and keeps me aware of just how much food I'm putting in my mouth.
Well I'll elaborate on that further in another post. And I'll also post my measurements later too. I have also learned in the past that inches lost makes you feel a thousand times better then the number on the scale some days.